We need to talk about shame.
SHAME. I’m seeing it everywhere lately…
Women ashamed that they “let someone” abuse them, too ashamed to speak up, or ashamed that they didn’t speak sooner.
Men ashamed of their behavior, for the behavior of other men, or men being shamed by others for being men.
People shamed for their skin color… or ashamed what others with the same skin color have done, or have neglected to do.
People shamed for how they voted, who they aligned with, or who they aligned against.
Know where else shame shows up? With our MONEY.
We’re ashamed that we don’t have enough (so we say), that we’ve made poor decisions… haven’t earned what we’re worth… have spent it unwisely or unconsciously… invested it recklessly… lost it needlessly… just “aren’t good with it,” and so on.
Or perhaps we’ve got “plenty” of it (so others would say), but we find ourselves ashamed that we STILL don’t feel “secure” enough, smart enough, generous enough, enough enough.
Shame immobilizes us. It makes us want to hide. It makes everything worse, and nothing better.
Recently, I was interviewed by Marcia Mariner for her “Wealthy From the Inside Out” telesummit.
Afterwards, I looked at what other speakers talked about… manifesting, prosperity, attracting money “effortlessly”!
I’ve definitely learned the art of making money. But I took a different approach.
I took a trip down memory lane to those dark, shameful moments. The times when I was SCARED. Ashamed… or being shamed by someone else.
When I didn’t know how I was going to keep my lights on, pay my bills, or where I was going to live after my foreclosure.
I’ve had huge financial wins, and I’ve suffered the damage of devastating financial storms. And as much as I’ve learned from earning six figures, being a landlord, or starting multiple businesses, I’ve probably learned MORE about Prosperity from losing it all.
And I mean EVERYTHING… my income, may savings, my credit, my investments, even my home.
When it the economy fell apart in the Great Recession… when the money ran out… when it was time to leave my home… when I had to start from scratch…
I discovered I was more resourceful, more peaceful, more truly abundant than I had imagined.
And when I discovered that quiet confidence, that utter sense of WELL-BEING within myself, I lacked nothing.
My outer circumstances finally turned around, and I never looked back. Now I have the freedom to live where I want, to travel, to do meaningful work and be well-rewarded for it. Life is PLENTIFUL!
But the key truly was finding that wealth on the inside first. As long as I was shaming myself, moving forward was not possible. When I embraced myself fully — including my pain and “failures” — everything changed.
If you’ve ever felt financial shame, fear, frustration or loss… I get it. And you have nothing to be ashamed of.
I told a friend recently that my “claim to fame” — if you can call it that — is being “the wealth coach who lost it all.”
Perhaps if I was a more sensible person, I’d only discuss my victories. I’d never speak of my losses, and hope that no one ever found out about my failures.
But I guess that’s not my style.
It’s time for the reign of financial shame to END.
Because the TRUTH is… you were born to be abundant. You are powerful, prosperous and FREE… right now!
You are not defined by your losses, but by the resilience those experiences create.
You are not defined by the numbers in your bank account today, but by the value you bring to those around you.
So let’s embrace ourselves with love and compassion. Face down the financial shame monster and declare yourself WORTHY. (Because you are!)
Your net worth does not have to determine your self-worth. Your current income is not fixed; it is changeable.
Believe that you have the power to change your circumstances and create the life you desire. (Because you do!)
— Kate
Total Wealth
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